Those Awkward Moments

Today was one of the most awkward days I have had since I've been here.  I knew it was coming, and I was doing my best to prepare for it, but learning a new language is not easy for me, even though I teach language.  I have strategies for building upon knowledge that's already there, but I'm admittedly not the best true beginning level language teacher.  My experiences right now are teaching me a lot of valuable lessons, though.  So, back to the awkwardness of the day...It was finally the day to meet the majority of Noi's family.  I will preface this entry, however, by stating that Noi's family members are wonderful and seem very patient so far.  However, nothing can take away the moment when you really want to say something or understand what everyone else is saying and you can't even make out one word they are saying because not only are they speaking another language but a different dialect of that language that you barely know a handful of phrases for.

Today was truly awkward, and I felt like a lost little puppy most of the day, being led along by those who are in the know to a place of unknown location in a city that I'm not very familiar with yet because I have yet to be able to engage in my own method of orienting myself to a new location (more on that in a later post, probably).  I was happy that at least a couple of Noi's family can speak a few words in English.  I was assured by Noi's sister (my new sister-in-law) and her willingness to ask me how I liked the time with her family.  I responded in a way that was really not how I wanted to say because there were no common words to express the awkwardness of the moment (i.e. "it was okay"...really, David? how lame was that response...I really didn't mean to offend anyone by it...just didn't know what to say).  However, I was very happy to finally have a chance to meet these wonderful people who make up Noi's family.  It was just a huge challenge to be an intelligent adult and not be able to express my thoughts.

We are back at the hotel now, and I plan to get out my Thai book and do my best to have at least a few words to say tomorrow (even if I have to write everything down word-for-word).  I truly love Noi and want to get to know her family better because they are truly top-notch people whom Noi loves very much and who are very much a part of her life (and now mine). 

The lesson in all of this, of course, is that when I work with students from the various countries we serve, I have an even more vivid undertstanding of what they are going through.  We have such wonderfully intelligent students (most of the time) who are struggling with one of the hardest tasks ever (learning a language) and feeling stressed by the same dynamics I'm going through and then some.  Those of you who are my colleagues reading this, please take note of this, as in a couple weeks, you are going to be face-to-face with this challenge yourselves...You are the person in the know, and you have the opportunity to go up to the students and ask them, "How was the experience?"  They may not know how to answer the question, even if they understand it completely...Be patient with them and help them feel comfortable (part of the IALC family, even).

For those of you who will have the chance to meet Noi, please understand that while she knows some of our language, she is going to struggle with understanding everything.  Don't talk louder, talk slower and be patient.  Be willing to say things over again and in different ways.  Smile warmly and let her know that it's okay and that you will help her find the words that are not readily at her tongue.

In closing, I appreciate Noi's family because they have helped "raise" a wonderful and caring woman who has decided to take a chance on becoming my wife and companion for the remainder of our lives...Noi's family's warm smiles are very sincere and seem very understanding.  I want to talk to them in their language because they have welcomed me and Caleb into their family.